Thursday, March 13, 2008

Obviously

This clearly falls in the "Duh!" category...but for some reason, recently I've been realizing--more than ever before--how much time homeschooling takes! And I'm realizing that because of my commitment to educate Josiah here at home, I just don't have the time to devote to other things like I would love to do. It's a shocking discovery, I know. :)

I think because I came into it thinking, "Oh, it's only kindergarten; it only takes an hour or two a day," I didn't mentally prepare myself for what a huge investment of time it is. Even an hour or two a day adds up (and sometimes we spend longer than that doing "school," especially on days when we have a fresh stack of books from the library waiting to be read)! Even an hour or two a day, if used for other things, could result in a cleaner house...or an organized recipe collection...or a weed-free flowerbed...or fewer dust bunnies under my bed...or a bigger pile of wood carried into our porch...or perfect picture files on the computer where I could instantly find nicely-labeled pictures from the past 3 years...or laundry that's been folded by me, not by my mother who's become my perpetual laundry helper (fortunately, she likes laundry!)...or any number of other worthwhile accomplishments.

Once again, I find myself facing the battle of determining what is best and separating it from what is merely good. Even in this single year of homeschooling, the memories we have made and the conversations we have had and the bonding we have enjoyed and the growth we have seen (growth in Josiah and in me!) are worth so much more than the value of a clean house. But honestly, I constantly have to remind myself of that. As I contemplate all the good stuff that I would like to do, I can either get discouraged (which I do more often than I would like to admit)...or I can focus on what has eternal value...and feel content--no, more than content; triumphant is a better word--with accomplishments in that realm. Even if my guest room is a mess and guests are expected next weekend... :)

I know the other factor in all of this is the ongoing adjustment to being a mother of 3. In the two months since Tobin's birth, we have all made HUGE adjustments...and thankfully, life feels so much more settled and "normal" and manageable than it did many times during the past 9 weeks. But still, the care of a newborn is, without a doubt, time-consuming; and that certainly affects how much time I have available for other projects. Sometimes I feel myself getting antsy because I just don't know when I will ever get around to certain things! Before Tobin was born, I basically knew our schedule and knew when I would have "free time" to devote to whatever I chose...and even if that available time wasn't happening immediately, it was comforting to look down the road and see it coming. All of that feels very unpredictable right now. I don't know when I'll have time to blog...I don't know when I'll ever have time to catch up on the other blogs I gain inspiration from...I don't know when I'll ever be able to go through all the papers in my everlasting "pile" by the telephone...I don't know when I'll ever get around to organizing the garden shed (OK, that one is waaaaayyyy down on the list of priorities!).

Anyway, as I look to the end of this first year of homeschooling (not that we're extremely close to that yet, but I'm already looking for it!), I have to realize that it's acceptable to anticipate the summer and the extra time during that season for various projects to do with the boys and by myself...but meanwhile, I have to make sure I don't begrudge the time I'm spending now to teach my son.

On a positive note, he's making such good progress!!! His reading is coming along so well. I'm immensely proud of him. But that's another story... :)

4 comments:

Marie said...

I can kinda understand your days, because I was a born and raised homeschool kid myself! I remember my mom trying to teach my sister and I how to read and we were slow learners unlike our two older brothers. I know she got frustrated at times. I don't know how my mom taught us 4 kids. I do remember and cherish the time she spent with us, it has made me who I am today. We learned how to read of course and love it more than most. I think what your doing is a very blessed thing! Keep up the good work!!!

Julie said...

Aren't seasons great? We move into and out of them, and I think the sooner that we can recognize them, the better. It's taken me a LONG time! I finally learned to seize my seasons of not pregnant/nursing to really dig in to projects like painting rooms, etc...

Today I had to remind myself that the over 2 hours spent outside with my littles at various times throughout the day was actually profitable. I had to not be discouraged that just when they are big enough to run around and have fun together another tiny one will be here to start the cycle all over again. This time last year, Kanah couldn't run and play and now she does.

Be thankful for your laundry helper as I am for my "Wednesday floor mopper" (mom who shows up faithfully each Wed.) and remember that you are in the season of teaching young ones and you are loving them well and that's all that matters. The piles can wait.

Hugs!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I can't say I understand your situation, but I can say that the road less traveled is blessed. It is easy as an outsider to say that all of those things on your to do list can wait, but when you're the one living it everyday it is not so easy. Take heart that what you are doing is an everlasting gift that you will never regret. Before you know it they will be grown and you will have great memories to look back on. Thank you for being so honest. Praying that God will ease your mind and and bless your efforts.

Valerie said...

I totally "AMEN!" what Jaedan's mom said---and everlasting is a great word to use. Davene--you yourself used the word "eternal" and that is exactly what we are investing in when we pour into our children's minds and hearts. AND--from a mom quite a few years down the road (me ;-), I wouldn't go back and spend more time on those temporal things at all!! I'm glad I let the dust bunnies accumluate while I read lots of books, I'm glad I gave up some of my hobbies (and even time with my friends) to be involved in not only my childrens' aducations, but also many of their extra-curricular activities. I am so thankful to the Lord for giving me vision, wisdom and mentors to encourage me in those choices. I don't think you will be sorry if you make the same choices.
I am coming very close (four or five years) to a new season when most all my time will again "free"--and though that will give me some time to rejuvenate myself in ways I have not formerly had, there is also a sense of continuing to want to invest in lives and souls---which are the only things eternal (well, besides God's Word!)
Like Mary, you are choosing what is most important!! Keep it up!!