Only One???

New Mom, in a comment on my last post, asked me a REALLY difficult question: if I could only recommend one parenting book as an "if you only read one parenting book in your life, read this one" type of book , which would it be?

I have no clue.

See, this is how it is for me. I have read such a wide variety of parenting books--from the very conservative (i.e. To Train Up a Child by Michael Pearl) to the "less conservative" (i.e. Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood by Jim Fay & Charles Fay). And in almost every book, I find something that I don't agree with or that doesn't fit into the way we have chosen to live as a family...BUT, in every book, I also find "tools" for my parenting "toolbox." In some situations, when building a house, you need a hammer--but not if you need to cut a piece of wood--then, you need a saw. But if you need to measure something, a saw won't work; and you need a tape measure. The same thing is true in life, I believe; and the same thing is true in raising children. Having the wisdom to discern which tool to use in each circumstance is the tricky part--and that's where a huge level of trust in God's Spirit to lead us is absolutely essential.

So...besides the books I've already mentioned in this blog, here are some other books/authors from which I've learned helpful tools:
~ Dr. James Dobson -- so many books, so much wisdom -- a classic figure in contemporary Christian family living -- and actually, not as lopsidedly conservative as I once thought :) -- Dare to Discipline, The Strong-Willed Child, Bringing Up Boys (that last one is on my nightstand to re-read soon) and others are good
~ Elisabeth Elliot -- The Shaping of a Christian Family comes to mind, in particular -- but such Godly character in this woman, and such good advice in her teachings!
~ Dr. Kevin Leman -- I've only recently discovered him, but I like what I've read so far
~ Gary Chapman -- The Five Love Languages of Children is excellent! -- if you had asked which marriage book I recommended most, this one (The Five Love Languages) would immediately have sprung off my tongue -- as far as practical marriage application that has helped Jeff and I the most, this would have to take the cake, I think -- and the application to raising children is no less profound, I believe

However, New Mom, if you and I were sitting down together over a cup of tea to discuss mothering and other adventures, the one book that I would hand you without a second thought would be Small Beginnings by Barbara Curtis. I read this for the first time when Josiah was a year and a month old, and it absolutely revolutionized my thinking about the toddler years (and, no, "revolutionized" is not too strong a word for this). Instead of giving into the myth of the "terrible twos," I instead saw the beauty and the wonder and the joy and the excitement of that stage of child development...and I eagerly anticipated and embraced all that was coming in the next few years of Josiah's life. Now that I think about it, I really should go back and read it again so I can have that same inspiration for David's life... :)

Of course, I have no idea how you, New Mom, are feeling about your son's current life status! Maybe Small Beginnings wouldn't be nearly as meaningful for you as it was for me, and that's fine. God works in so many different ways through different voices to lead and guide His children! But since you asked, that's my recommendation... :)

I'm sure the other moms reading might have a thing or two to say about what their all-time favorite parenting book would be! Isn't diversity a beautiful thing? :)