21 Weeks...22 Weeks...

This post was intended for last week as just a 21 weeks post.  However, the continued unpredictability of our computer made it impossible for me to get it posted last week, so here it is now as a combo 21 and 22 weeks post.  No big deal...

I had asked Josiah to take my 21 weeks picture (because the evening I wanted it taken, Jeff was knee deep in computer trouble and I didn't want to call him away from that), so Josiah eagerly complied.  The following picture is the result (actually, he took tons of pictures--he's a snap-happy kid--but this was the one I liked best because it makes me laugh):

I didn't edit the picture in any way because looking at it, just as it is, makes me smile.  I'm not sure if Josiah was trying to be artistic by shooting it at an angle or if his arms were tired of holding the camera in a vertical position or what.  In any case, I appreciate him not including all of my backside in the picture--a nice touch, don't you think?  (Speaking of which, Josiah assumed a thoughtful pose and said to me this morning, "I don't know if it's the baby, but...pause...your butt looks bigger.")  Is there such a thing as too honest?  Note to self: add "lessons in tact" to homeschool curriculum--ASAP!  :)

During my pregnancy with Tobin, I occasionally posted pictures of my big belly, so I guess it's about time to do the same with this one.  Here I am at 22 weeks, 1 day, showing a few stretch marks above my navel.  I always get those in that spot.

One of the best pregnancy happenings this past week was sitting on the couch reading and, for the first time, seeing my belly move as the baby kicked and squirmed.  I thought it was a little early for that, but I sat there and watched for a while and definitely saw movement.  It was so much fun!  :)

Our bedroom has two new residents: a bottle of Tums in my nightstand (yes, heartburn has begun; and although I only get it occasionally, it is bothersome when it comes) and a huge curved pregnancy pillow in our bed.  My back had begun to hurt--just a little--but I decided it was time to go ahead and drag out that beloved beast of a pillow to see if it would help.  I really do love that thing, but it takes up so much room that I only use it when I'm pregnant and really need it.  After the next 4 months or so, I'll be glad to put it away again and snuggle only with my husband.  :)

Speaking of my back, I had been doing pretty well with it...until last evening when it began to hurt significantly.  I thought I had just done a little too much yesterday since I didn't get my customary afternoon downtime; but I was sure after a good night's sleep, it would be back to normal.  It wasn't...and isn't.  I'm being reminded of how difficult ordinary tasks are with an aching back.  Lifting Tobin out of his crib, getting him out of the playpen, lifting him at all, getting clothes out of the dryer, unloading the dishwasher, etc. -- all of it is a reminder to me to not take a pain-free back for granted!

One new thing I've noticed during these weeks is that my internal heater seems to be kicking in...at least, occasionally.  I had looked forward to being nice and toasty warm all winter long because of the baby, but it didn't happen and I spent much of the winter feeling cold.  Now that spring is near (although our weather the past few days has still been chilly), it looks as if I might be finally hitting the I'm-so-hot-where's-the-fan stage of pregnancy.  What timing.

I haven't mentioned it because Old Order Mennonites don't make a big deal (publicly) about pregnancy, but I am delighted to the tips of my toes that my neighbor Wilma is also pregnant!!!  When I told her our news very early on, she broke her normal pattern of secrecy about her own pregnancy long enough to tell me that they also were being blessed with another child!  Whenever I think about it, such joy fills me.  In respect to her tradition, I haven't tried to pry all the details of her pregnancy out of her.  :)  But every once in a while, we'll share with each other how we're feeling and how things are going; and that's a lot of fun.  She's due a month before me.  Won't it be wonderful to have two new little ones in our neighborhood this summer?  They have three girls ("the girls," that Josiah and David love to play with); and her girls (the older two anyway...the youngest doesn't even know about the baby yet) are convinced that they're having a boy.  Wilma and Douglas did find out the gender at their ultrasound, but they're not telling a soul.  I teased Wilma that I was going to sneak over and take a look at her sewing pile to try to find some clues, but she didn't think I would discover anything that way.  :)  I remember vividly that when their family first came over to visit us right after Tobin was born, Rosalie, the oldest, whispered to her mom after holding Tobin, "I wish he was ours."  When Wilma told me that at the time, it made me cry.  Of course!  Everything made me cry in those days.  But I'm so grateful that God is giving both of us the gift of a child at nearly the same time this summer.

One day last week, we were in the barbershop; and Brenda, one of the stylists, asked me if I had maternity clothing for every season by now.  I told her I did, after this many pregnancies; and she laughed and said that I'd probably be eager to get rid of that clothing after this baby is born.  But ya know, I'm not.  I don't have a strong sense of "this is it--no more pregnancies ever--I'm through!"  My friend Amy, who felt a strong sense of being "done" after her two pregnancies, shared with me that her midwife told her that some women never get that feeling of "doneness."  I can potentially see that being true for me.  Not that I particularly want a dozen children or feel at all capable of that task (or called to it, for that matter)...  But I don't know what the future holds, and I don't feel certain that this is the last one.  When Jeff and I were talking about this, I told him that if this baby happens to be a girl, I would almost feel like maybe we should have another one so there would be the chance for our daughter to have a sister!  (Whenever I see a close sister relationship--like Christy and Sarah have, for example--I think of what a treasure that would be...and would an only daughter regret not having the chance at that kind of relationship?)  Jeff said, "Oh, no.  If we do have a girl this time, and then we did have another, you wouldn't want to stop but you'd say we would need to make it even with 3 boys and 3 girls!"  Where will it end?  :)  

By the way, I'm not writing this as a prediction that there are even more children in our future.  There have been times in our past when I thought the road was leading one way and--woah!--here it goes another way...like last November when that pregnancy test turned positive...and those memories keep me humble when I start feeling like I've got the road ahead all mapped out neatly for us.  One thing I'm certain of: only God knows what our future holds, so I write these thoughts down just for fun, just to be able to look back and see what I was thinking and what we were saying at a certain point in time.  That's all.  No prophecies.  No promises.  :)