Details, Details

First, a silly picture of my painted toenails shortly after delivery. I can't say that I thought about them much as I was pushing Tobin out, but I do believe I noticed them when I was relaxing in the jacuzzi shortly before his birth. :)

And now, the "important" stuff...

For the past week and a half, I've been jotting down notes about various random details from the delivery and the days following. These are things which may not mean much to other people, but I don't want to forget them! I wish now that I had written more of these things down after the births of Josiah and David, so I guess I'm trying to make up for that now by recording every little piece of the play-by-play account of Tobin's birth that I can possibly think of!

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On Saturday morning, the day Tobin was born, as Jeff was dressing to go to work, he asked me if the clothes he was wearing would be OK if Tobin was born that day. At that point, of course, there was no indication that this was THE DAY, so I thought it funny that Jeff asked that question. But he knew that, when the day came, I would think about what he was wearing and would want it to be clothes that I liked for the pictures we would take. I gave him my wifely seal of approval on his clothes, and he headed off to work. Little did we know those would really be the clothes in the all-important first pictures with Tobin. :)

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In the week(s) preceding Tobin's birth, we had all been trying to figure out when I would give birth based on my behavior. If I was energetic and accomplished much of anything, it was labeled "nesting"--and surely, a baby would soon follow. When this had happened a few times, I gave up all hope of that being any sort of clue! But, as it turns out, the week before his birth, I had a very energetic day on Monday and got a lot of stuff done, followed by tired days the rest of the week...until Friday when I had an urge to work hard and finish some projects. That morning, I called my mother and said, "I feel selfish for asking this, but do you think you could come up and help me some today?" She said she'd be delighted to do that. :) So we tackled my huge mountain of laundry and got that done, as well as some other little projects I'd been wanting to do. It was nice to go to bed that evening with a real sense of accomplishment. The next day was Saturday, and I had an urge to hard-boil more than a dozen eggs, just to have on hand for quick meals. Before I could even get them peeled after they cooked, my water broke and labor began and Tobin was born. My mother had to finish that project for me when she got back here from the hospital after his birth; and when I came home the next day, I was glad to see a big bowl of hard-boiled eggs in the refrigerator. During that first busy, hormonal week, it was so nice to be able to grab one or two of those for a easy, nutritious meal.

Anyway, between the laundry and the eggs, was that nesting? Or was I just being myself??? :)

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When I went into labor with Josiah, Jeff took fairly extensive notes about when exactly I had contractions and how long they lasted. I'm sure I still have that paper somewhere which he used to record all that data. For this labor however, these were the only notes he took:
2:45-
4
2:49-
7
2:56
And that's it! I was so completely NOT focused on the contractions that he would have to ask me whether I was having one and I'd have to stop and think about whether I was or not. It was really nice to not be obsessed with them this time around. :)

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When I got into the first position to push (kneeling on the lowered bottom part of the bed), we were interrupted by a cheery voice at the door of my room, calling out, "Room service!" (Hmm...anybody want to take a break and grab some dinner? It's OK--really--we can have this baby later!) I was glad that interruption didn't occur about a half an hour later when I was REALLY pushing!

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As I had read other women's birth stories, I had often seen mention of the "ring of fire" that many women feel as they push; but I had never consciously experienced that with my other deliveries. Notice I said "consciously," because obviously I must have felt it...but didn't realize it or think about it in terms of a "ring of fire." Now however, I can definitely say that I know exactly what that means--and how that feels!

If I remember correctly from what I've read, some women experience a sense of relief when they hit the ring of fire stage--almost as if the pain goes away and they simply feel this intense drive to push. I can't say that I felt it exactly like that, since it was all pretty unbearable at that point. But I did feel encouraged that the end was near.

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I had mentioned earlier about the cord position when Tobin was born--across his shoulder and around his waist. The technical term for that is "bandolier," so my father informed me...and it seems to be fairly rare. Dad said that in his 700+ deliveries (when he was delivering babies years ago), he had never delivered a baby with the cord in that position. At my 6-week follow-up visit, I want to ask the midwife about her experiences with that.

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Speaking of my dad, he called us about 10 minutes after Tobin was born. He was at home with Josiah and David, and I'm sure he was just as curious as could be to know what was going on at the hospital and how things were progressing. Jeff took the call and was able to pass along the good news to him, and Dad and the boys were able to come into the hospital that evening to meet Tobin for the first time which was really special. Just like with the room service call, I was very glad that Dad called when he did and not 12 or so minutes earlier! :)

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For the first time during one of my deliveries, I was able to listen to music that we took with us. We planned to do that during Josiah's birth; but about half the supplies I had packed for that delivery ended up staying in the car and never being brought into the hospital because once we were admitted, I didn't want Jeff leaving me for a minute to go out to the car again! But this time, we carried in a small CD player and a few CDs; and I LOVED having that music during the labor and for the rest of my time in the hospital. The first CD that I asked Jeff to put on was one of the Christmas gifts he gave me this past year: Dark Yet Lovely by Heather Clark. It is all music from the Song of Songs, and I first became acquainted with it earlier this year at the wedding of a very good friend. The first song on the CD is called "Kisses of Your Mouth," and one of the lines says, "Take me away with You...let's hurry...take me away with You." That was the first song I heard during labor in the hospital, and I did feel "carried away"--it was perfect.

By the time I was ready to push, we were listening to Sara Groves' CD called "Conversations." When the music first started, the midwife remarked about what a beautiful voice Sara has, and I told her who the singer was. Oddly enough, when I was deep in "the zone," focusing on labor and actually wishing I wasn't in it :), the song "Painting Pictures of Egypt" happened to be playing. Here are some of the words from that:

I've been painting pictures of Egypt,
Leaving out what it lacks.
The future feels so hard,
And I wanna go back!
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I've learned.
Those roads were closed off to me
While my back was turned!

Even in my mental fog, I could totally relate to this song!!!
And then these words:

If it comes too quick,
I may not appreciate it.
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?
And if it comes too quick,
I may not recognize it.
Is that the reason behind all this time and sand?

At this point I was hoping with all my might that "it" would come a little quicker! But looking back, I do have to smile at the timing of these words with what I was going through. :)

Later, after Tobin's birth, when I was filled with joy and relief, these words from another Sara Groves song that happened to be playing penetrated my brain:

I love my husband, my house, my job.
Couldn't be any better...

The next day while I was relishing my time with Tobin in the hospital, I enjoyed listening to my "Morning Light" CD by Steve Green, as well as my "Hiding Place" CD by Selah. Overall, it added so much to my experience to have music that I had lovingly chosen weeks in advance as part of it.

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And speaking of music, when I awoke in the night--that first precious night--another song was running through my head. It was from a Hermie and Friends Scripture Memory Songs CD that we gave David for Christmas and (I think) we had been listening to over lunch shortly before my water broke. The song is from Psalm 139:13-14--what could be more perfect for a baby's birth?--and the phrase that kept running through my head that night was the chorus of the song, "What you have done is wonderful. I know this very well!" That was a very special time of rejoicing for me.

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Another predominant theme in my thoughts that night was thanking God that I was "on the other side." I think my friend Julie has used that phrase to describe being safely through childbirth, and it was exactly what I was feeling. After so much eager anticipation, to finally have given birth and now to have the joy of getting to know Tobin and nurturing him through each day--well, I couldn't stop thanking God for bringing me to the other side!

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Tobin was the only baby delivered in our hospital on January 12.

After the delivery, I walked from the birthing room past the nursery to see them giving him a bath and checking him and then on to my recovery room. As we passed the big whiteboard that had the pertinent info for all the patients delivering babies, it was a funny feeling to see only one name on the board: mine. :)

According to the nurses and the midwife, it's either feast or famine in the maternity ward. Sometimes they are simply swamped with delivering moms, and other times it is very slow. I was glad to be there during a slow day!

When I was in my intense half-hour before Tobin's birth, I had worried that I was making too much noise. Jeff told me later that I wasn't actually very loud at all. And as it turns out, there weren't any other delivering moms around for me to disturb even if I had been noisy!

When Josiah was born, I was so worried (irrationally, I know) that he would get switched with another baby. With Tobin's birth, I didn't have to worry about that! (Although, there were two other babies in the hospital that had been born the day before him; but when he was taken to the nursery for a bath and check-up the night he was born, he was the only one in there, so no possiblity of a mix-up!)

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While I was having a peaceful first night with Tobin in the hospital, Jeff had come home to a sick boy, David. Unbeknownst to us, after my parents had brought the boys home from seeing us in the hospital, David had thrown up a few times in the kitchen; and my dear mother had gone from the euphoria of seeing a new grandson born to the hands-and-knees drudgery of cleaning up after another grandson. During that night, David continued to throw up--I think it was at least 3 more times--so Jeff was kept busy cleaning up David, putting sheets and blankets in the washing machine and finding new ones for the bed, and cleaning up the couch since David threw up on that, too. The funny thing is that David was basically a happy camper, I'm told, through this whole process. He'd be happy, then throw up, then be happy again. And he got 3 baths in the middle of the night, so what's not to be joyful about??? Poor Jeff. He wasn't feeling well himself, yet had no choice but to care for a sick son. In comparison, I had it easy, although I too threw up that night--actually, early the next morning. It seems an abdominal bug attacked our family, hitting Josiah very lightly first (2 nights before Tobin's birth), then hitting the rest of us. Maybe part of the reason that first week was so hard was because of the added burden of sickness. Even though by that time the boys seemed fine, Jeff and I had to deal with being sick ourselves, and that was no fun.

But, boy, was I ever glad to miss out on that first night of David's sickness! ;)

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I actually have a few other things I'd like to write about, but it's time to feed Tobin again...and I think this post is long enough already. ;) The other details I want to record are things that I've noticed during this past week and a half at home, so I'll end this section about hospital stuff and go feed my precious baby!